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Blog / News
Dates I Fucked Up
February 14, 2016
In light of Valentine’s Day, the day of pretend love, I’d like to shed light on how socially odd I can be, especially when dating. I don’t write a lot about my love life. This is mostly because comedy consumes my life, and I’m a very selfish person, and rarely put anyone else before me
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Lori Palminteri’s Anti-Self Help Guide
February 7, 2016
If your life is as great as you pretend it is on social media, maybe you want to take it down a few notches? Maybe, you look yourself in the mirror and say, “wow, I lead a fulfilled life, and I would like to suffer for the sake of suffering.” When it comes to worrying,
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The Holy Grail
January 31, 2016
Sir Lancelot: [Sir Galahad the Chaste is being seduced by an entire castle full of young women] We were in the nick of time. You were in great peril. Sir Galahad: I don’t think I was. Sir Lancelot: Yes, you were. You were in terrible peril. Sir Galahad: Look, let me go back in there
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January Dreams
January 25, 2016
There’s a strange myth that one doesn’t dream when they go to bed high, and there’s a bad hacky joke about it too, that goes something like, “when you get stoned you don’t have dreams, and your real life dreams die too.” This has never been true. At least not for me. Actually, going to
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Comedy Central
January 18, 2016
When I was just a sophomore in college, I arbitrarily applied for all sorts of internships. This seemed like the thing to do to get experience, and a “foot in the door.” Amongst internships I reasoned I had a pretty good shot at getting, I also researched and sent out cover letters and resumes to
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The Great Depression
January 10, 2016
Growing up, my Father was a stern, stubborn, self confident man feared by the kids in my neighborhood despite the fact that he only stands at 5’7 (and a half, if you ask him) feet tall. He always had a reputation of the type of Dad who could fix anything, always willing to lend a
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Faster & Faster & Further From Peace
January 3, 2016
I’ve always liked to go fast. Run fast. Bike fast. Speeding in a boat. Speeding in a car. Down a snowy hill. Dropping in on a wave. Fast. Fast. Faster. Back in the day, I was a track runner. Sprints were not my thing, but I was dominant in long distance running. Running track was
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A Song List for 2015
December 28, 2015
This year has been a particularly great year for new music. I spend a lot of time in my car listening to new music. Also, walking around the city listening to music. Or writing in my apartment or random cafe’s listening to music. I listen to everything from classical Mozart to movie scores, Bob Dylan
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Lori in the Sky with Diamonds
December 21, 2015
Prologue: Is it douchey to have a prologue for a blog? Probably. Whatever. I just wanted to share with you this important piece of information before we continue. I stopped eating red meat. Okay, that information itself is not so important, but the reason why is. I had bacon only a couple times in the
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Ghosts
December 13, 2015
My sister and I shared a room growing up. When we were kids, it was great, as we grew older, it was not so great. Lisa and I are very different people. We look alike. A lot a like. But Lisa enjoys the simple things, and trusts people to the point of naiveté, and I
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