K.I.S.S.

• Lori Palminteri
• Uncategorized
• June 19, 2021

I’m unsure where the saying came from or how far back it goes. But it lingers and is repeatedly spoken because of how true it is. Keep it simple, stupid.

I might as well get it tattooed on me as a reminder. Most recently, my manager said this about my script. As I tend to wonky with my ideas which leads me (and my characters) down strange paths and I’ll write myself into a corner. So I open my laptop, open a notebook with a fresh page and think, keep it simple stupid.

I suppose the irony of the saying is that the less intelligent have a greater capacity to be simple. I realize that sounds like an insult, and it could be, but I don’t mean in that sense at the moment. In general, those with the ability to be simple (in whatever that even means), I believe, are happier. That the most intelligent people I know are tortured.

Sometimes I wish there were switches in my mind. The thought loops just keep looping and there’s many of them and they overlap and it’s overwhelming and it makes me want to yell, “JUST STOP” to my own stupid but not-so-stupid brain. I wish there was a way for the loops to just happen once a day and then stop for the rest of day. That’s it. You were thought about. Now go on the shelf and I’ll loop you tomorrow. I just want to live today as today. I want you to leave me alone. Keep it simple, stupid, stupid, brain.

I read somewhere a long time ago that Lady Gaga’s song “Telephone” wasn’t actually about a person nagging her but her inner monologue that won’t leave her alone when she just wants a break from it. It made me like the song a whole lot more. Huh. A little all too relatable.

But what about my career? What am I not getting more gigs? I need to edit my screenplay. I need to continue my book. What about current and past loves? Are my friends okay? Do they need me? Am I too needy to them? I miss my family. My family is driving me crazy. When did politics become so hateful? Why aren’t some of my comedy heroes more successful? I wish there were more waves. I just want to go surfing. I wish I was better at surfing. Shouldn’t I be working out more? Eating less sugar? Are these pills keeping me from killing myself? Are they doing anything at all? What aren’t I happier? Why do I desire things I can’t have? Why are we not talking more about UFO’s that the government confirmed exist and they’ve been lying to us for decades? Why hasn’t Ghislaine Maxwell been put on trial yet to expose democrats, republicans, royal family members, and Hollywood big shots in their pedophilia ways? Why is the public not demanding her head? When will the next pandemic happen? Will I lose my job again? Will my nephews and niece have as good of a childhood as I did, or even better? What will the state of the country or even the world be when they are older? Will there be peace or opportunity? Will they have my depression? Will they ever know how much they mean to me? Will my parents stay healthy and live long, long lives? Will my best friends find their soul mates, even the ones who don’t believe in such romantic notions? When will I see my cousins again? Will my comedian brothers get big breaks, television, or become the draw that they deserve? Will I sell a script? A novel? Would I be happier if I just lived in a small shack by the beach? How come I’m always tired? If I drink expresso, will it make me shit myself? Will we ever make contact with extra terrestrial life? Is it too late to save the oceans? Will I ever swim with whale sharks? Will cancel culture ever end? Will I land the job of my dreams and them get canceled for a dumb ass tweet I wrote in 2012? Will my car break down soon? Can I afford to fix it when it does? Will a bug crawl into my ear and eat my brain? When and where am I traveling to next? How can I just getaway? Why am I not getting more gigs? I should be editing my screenplay right now. Should I go for a run? Are my friends sick of my bullshit and doomsday outlook? Why aren’t we talking about the UFOs? Wait. Didn’t I already think about all these things?

Keep it simple, stupid.

And then. A hug from my nephew. Dropping in on a wave. A collective cracking up with best friends. A family reunion. That moment a new joke kills. A good cry from a new Pixar movie. Writing the most perfect sentence after writing a hundred sentences that don’t matter. A simple smile. There it is, stupid.