Another Funeral, A Fart Joke & A Small Ask

• Lori Palminteri
• Uncategorized
• January 15, 2022

Great Aunt Camille was my grandma’s sister and her life long best friend. There were never sweeter sisters. Between the two of them, I’m unsure they ever spoke poorly about anyone. My grandma didn’t speak all that much, actually. She was a quiet, timid woman. Camille was a bit spunkier and funnier. Even though Camille was a lot younger, I feel like she was always my grandma’s protector, in a world where people would be quick to take advantage of someone as kind as my grandma. To know them, was to love them.

She passed away and she will be missed.

During the week, the family gathered at the wake in her memory. My sister didn’t have anyone to watch my niece, Charlotte, so she brought her along. Charlotte is just shy of four, so we figured she’s still young enough to not really understand what a wake is. When they showed up, we kept her towards the back of the room, away from the body. She sat with me, eating mini muffins, saying, “Lori, I love you.” I don’t think anyone in my life has told me they love me more than Charlotte. She tells me constantly. It’s so sweet.

When my cousin Christine came she jumped in her arms. Shortly after, a priest arrived to do a reading/prayer. We stayed in the back. I was a little worried about Charlotte in the sense that Charlotte LOVES to talk and she doesn’t understand volume control, so we’d have to be on our toes to quickly pull her out of the room if needed.

It wasn’t needed, however. She was so well behaved. She sat quietly in Christine’s arms. Christine complimented her in a whisper, “you’re being so good, Charlotte. I’m so proud of you.”

A moment passes, and Charlotte says softly and oh so sweetly, “I farted.” Christine, myself and my sister almost burst into hysterical laughter.

I told my aunt Nancy, who is the living embodiment of kindness, like her mother and aunt, and she laughed, “wow, I didn’t realize just how much she’s like your father.”

This was literally the funniest fart joke I’ve ever heard. And I’m convinced I’ve heard them all. And just like that, there’s this little moment from this little girl, who doesn’t even realize how funny she is yet, who proves that not only does life go on, but that laughter in the most unlikely of moments is the very essence of life.

And now, my dear readers, comes the first time I’m going to ask you for money. For a donation. Many of you have donated already, and I personally appreciate it on a huge level.

This is the first gofundme I’ve ever spearheaded. It is for the Miller family. As a reader of my blog, you’ve already learned I’ve been mourning my dear friend, Jeff. My heart is still broken for his wonderful wife and four awesome kids.

You feel so powerless when someone is gone too soon. And I know the family well enough to know they aren’t really comfortable with any sort of charity. Andrea, in her selflessness, will bring up other people who need more than her family does.

Jeff was a surfer. Our love for the ocean was something we shared. No one quite knows the feeling a surfer gets when they catch a wave except other surfers. Which is why I think it’s a great idea to get the kids some surf lessons. Because they have many hard times ahead of them, but they also have great times ahead of them. So many great things will happen in their life, in what’s to come. It is my belief that every time they go to the ocean, they will feel closer to their father.

So I’m raising some money. I’m going to use some of the money to rent the Skudin Surf Pool at the American Dream Mall in NJ (if you recall, I wrote a blog about surfing that pool). I’ve seen first hand that the instructors there do a great job at teaching newbies the sport. These kids deserve a fun day to celebrate the life of their father! There’s nothing he would want more than to smile on his kids having the time of their lives in the water.

Please, if you can, make a donation… no matter how small. Every little bit counts. As I’ve stated in the gofundme home page, some of the proceeds will also go to the family and cancer research. Thank you for helping to put a smile on these kids faces. It means a lot to me, and would mean even more to their dad.

Jeff, you are missed so much. Wherever you are now, I hope there is surf. Your legacies—your kids—will ride on.

Donate here.