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93 Miles
June 7, 2015
I guess it’s best to start at the beginning. It may help you understand. It may help to know I tend to be manic, and I get into these bizarre but familiar funks where I start to lose my shit. Basically, you have rational thoughts, and irrational thoughts. Everyone does. If you’re remotely intelligent, you
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Girl Walks Into A Bar
May 31, 2015
Girl walks into a bar, alone. It’s a Friday. The smell of a joint lingers in her hair. She came to this particular bar for two reasons: it was close to home, and they were showing the Ranger game on a large projector screen. The place is not big. Most the seats are taken. Even
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Q&A
May 24, 2015
Where was your first performance on stage, and how did it go? Do you remember the first joke you told to an audience? (Dough H.) My first stand-up performance was a bringer show (a new talent show where you have to bring x amount of people for x amount of stage time, for those not
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Older
May 17, 2015
When I was a young girl, I wanted to be older. Most kids want to be older, but only by a couple years. I wanted to be an adult. Adults seemed so smart to me back then. My parents, aunts, and uncles will attest, I was an extremely mature child, making me odd, but pleasant.
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Opia
May 10, 2015
Everyone has regrets. Anyone who tells you otherwise is either lying to you or lying to themselves. It’s impossible to live a life without regrets. I declare that if you don’t have any regrets, you’re doing life wrong. Regrets. I have a few. I have some that changed my whole life. Some I haven’t told
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Grim Readers
May 4, 2015
Last year, my best friend Jimmy pitched me an idea for a reading comprehension web site for students. Jimmy is a teacher, and he found that the reading comprehension sites available for teachers contain bland stories that make both teachers and students dread doing reading comprehension. Thus, he told me he wanted to start his
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How Game Of Thrones Debunks Marriage
April 25, 2015
“Do you know what the realm is? It’s the thousand blades of Aegon’s enemies, a story we agree to tell each other over and over, until we forget that it’s a lie.” – Petyr Baelish HBO’s Game of Thrones has made Medieval Fantasy not just for huge nerds. It’s sexy, smart, and bloody as all
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Mother Ocean
April 19, 2015
I hit the snooze button on my alarm clock again. I wasn’t always this way. I used to not have to set an alarm. I used to wake up automatically at six in the morning, and I’d get out of bed to start my day. Back then, I couldn’t even understand why anyone used the
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NEWS STUFF: Study Links Time Spent On Buzzfeed With Depression
April 12, 2015
BALDWIN, NY, after getting off the LIRR where she was forced to listen to a woman arguing with someone on their cellphone for twenty minutes during her commute, an exhausted 37 year-old, Justine Jordan, wishes someone would make more Buzzfeed quizzes. “Every time someone posts a Buzzfeed quiz on their Facebook, I’m anxious to see
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Easter Egg Hunt
April 4, 2015
“You’re going to die a horrible death, remember. It’s all good training, and you’ll enjoy it more if you keep the facts in mind. Take your dying with some seriousness, however. Laughing on the way to your execution is not generally understood by less advanced lifeforms, and they’ll call you crazy.” –From Illusions, The Adventures
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